the DJ got us fallin' in love again.
So, tomorrow college classes start and I couldn't be more nervous. Yeah, I've had them before, but for some odd reason, this time around I'm just super anxious. I think its because I have four this semester and I'm afraid of getting behind and not doing good. I'm going to try my hardest to get at least B's in all of them, because i want awards this year dammit! LOL. I have to focus and not let any other bullshit get in the way, I need my education.
I don't know what I'm doing about the whole Ryan situation anymore. Obviously he's not going to budge and he's dead set on not having a relationship, but I still don't understand why though. I mean, you have to take chances in order to see if anything will work. I dont even think im that bad looking honestly, but it's always the same shit guy after guy. That we "wouldn't work out," we're "too good of friends," and now this " i need to get my life straight." So, obviously im just this huge problem in your life that you can't handle me, but you can come back for sex whenever right? And im the stupid one still giving it to you, cause im a horny teenager who wants it. Somehow or someway, I need to either control that, find someone new or just completely stop worrying about boys for the moment. Because i can't keep up with this. I get too upset afterward.
I don't know what I'm doing about the whole Ryan situation anymore. Obviously he's not going to budge and he's dead set on not having a relationship, but I still don't understand why though. I mean, you have to take chances in order to see if anything will work. I dont even think im that bad looking honestly, but it's always the same shit guy after guy. That we "wouldn't work out," we're "too good of friends," and now this " i need to get my life straight." So, obviously im just this huge problem in your life that you can't handle me, but you can come back for sex whenever right? And im the stupid one still giving it to you, cause im a horny teenager who wants it. Somehow or someway, I need to either control that, find someone new or just completely stop worrying about boys for the moment. Because i can't keep up with this. I get too upset afterward.
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